Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Mean Mom of the Year Award

BEWARE THIS IS GOING TO BE A VERY LONG POST:

Can anyone else relate to this? I am feeling like such a mean mom today...but I think it was necessary...or could I have avoided this whole situation by using better parenting skills? I'm just not sure.

Well the morning started off like any other morning. Sweet "Hellos" and hugs as my children enter my bedroom at about 8 a.m. I was showered and ready to go because we had a lot of things going on that morning. I get breakfast on the table and quickly things go south. I start to find myself saying things like, "Hurry up. You need to get ready. We're going to be late. Quit playing. Take another bite. O.K. You're done. You're taking too long. Etc." (Now let me preface all of that because I am out of patience after a bad week or so of children not listening 24/7.) So we get Blake to school on time. I had to go inside too to do this Take Home Reading Book Exchange thing that I volunteered to do every Wednesday. This was mistake #1 because what I thought would take about 25 minutes turned into taking about 45 minutes because they added a new element to the proceedure. Maya was sort of being a good sport to entertain herself while I did the exchange - until the very end. For some random reason she got on this kick that she wanted gum. Well, I apologize, but I did not have any gum. You would think that explaining this to a very bright little 3 year old would be good enough. Mistake #2. It was not good enough for the little diva and the tantrum began to unfold. And, me (being the mean mom that I am) did not cater to her desires. Well, I take that back, I did try to grow gum off of my pretend tree, but that was not good enough. So as we were rushing out to my car I realized Maya's ride to preschool/halloween party was going to be at my house in just a few minutes. So I tried to call my friend, Sabrina and tell her that we were late and that I would have to take her to school myself. Well, we are rushing. I am talking on the phone. Maya is screaming. We get in the car. She says, "You are so mean! You are so mean!!!" I ignore her as we started driving home. I started fantasizing out loud..."Maybe I will go away. Go on vacation or something. Maybe we can find someone else to take care of you guys for a little while." She starts crying even more..."NO! I don't want you to leave!" "Why? You guys won't mind. You'll be fine," I say. "No!" she said. I said, "Why not?" She said, "Because I love you! But you're still mean!" So, I call Sabrina to tell her that if she hasn't left yet, that I might beable to just throw Maya's costume on her and she could still catch a ride. Maya starts talking about how she doesn't want to go. So we get inside my house. I grab the costume while explaining that she can go with Sabrina and go to her party. It's going to be great! Yeah. Well, I start trying to put the full body suit - Cow costume - thing (that my neighbor lent me) on Maya and she is screaming, "I don't want to go!" We attempted 2 or 3 times and then I hear the faint sound of the doorbell. I open the door and say, "She's not going! She is NOT going. Blah, Blah, Blah - a lot of ranting and raving" as I walk with Sabrina outside. Maya was freaking out back in the house. When I got back inside she went straight to time out in her room while I unwound for a few minutes. Then I went in to soothe her a little. We exchanged some hugs. I told her that she wasn't going to go to the party though. Then she started freaking out again because she wanted to go. Especially when she saw me grab the costume that I was going to wear and say, "Let's take this back to Keri." "No!!! I want to go to the party!" Needless to say, she freaked all the way to Keri's house and back (a 20 minute roundtrip drive.) So I am the mom that did not let her 3 year old go to her Halloween party. Yes, I feel a little bit bad that she missed it, but if my kids keep this up, they will miss out on trick-or-treating as well. So, I'll let you know (not that anyone looks at this blog but I had to vent) how it all turns out. Fortunately though, there weren't any more incidences today. We even played in the leaves in the backyard. Why is it they only do what I ask when I have something to threaten them with. Oh, the sweet leverage of Trick-or-treating...


Well here is some evidence that we did have some fun today...





6 comments:

christyephillips said...

I'm sorry you had a bad day/week. You are not a mean mom! You are strong, and hopefully she'll learn from it and remember this. I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels like a big meanie!

Keri said...

Amber, I know you feel like a mean mom, but you have to know that it sounds like you're a lot nicer than others who would have been a heck of a lot meaner to their tantrum-throwing child. ANYWAY, I'm glad the day turned out good, and I hope they keep it up, or else Spence and Andrew might have to share their candy! ;) (which is actually not such a bad idea!)

emily said...

Amber...You rock! Good for you for stickin' to your guns. Not that I'm perfect at it, but I'm actually kind of sick of hearing parents make empty threats! So, my hat's off. She'll learn very quickly that you mean what you say and that she's not going to walk all over you. You'll be glad later...it'll all pay off, promise. Thanks for venting...we all have bad days!

Sarah Anne said...

This made me laugh so hard.
"Maybe I'll go on vacation..." Too funny. I'm amazed she said she loves you. Emma just says she wants a new mom. Your kids are beautiful. I miss them and you.

b davis said...

Oh, those tantrums are draining too. You're good to get out and play in the leaves after an emotional day. No worries about mean mom award, we all know you're sweet as pie.

Dottie said...

I read your blog :) hehhe your a great mom and quite frankly I would have done the same thing. They will thank you some day for being consistent and that they have rules. Have a good Halloween!